


Will you go away? Will I go away from you?

by DrunnkIvy



Category: (여자)아이들 | (G)I-DLE, Mamamoo
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Universe, Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:28:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27767518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrunnkIvy/pseuds/DrunnkIvy
Summary: Shuhua and Soojin are the most famous couple in South Korea, they grow up in the public eye. But being port of a famous K=Pop girl group wasn't always easy, especially when you're in a LGBTQIA+ relationship. After five years dating and dealing with the media Shuhua and Soojin face a crises on their relationship. The question is, will their love be strong enough to get through it?orShuhua and Soojin started dating after two years being part of (G)I-DLE, but after a article published by Dispatch the couple have the biggest fight so far.
Relationships: Cho Miyeon/Minnie Nicha Yontararak, Kim Yongsun | Solar/Moon Byulyi | Moonbyul, Seo Soojin/Yeh Shuhua
Comments: 14
Kudos: 64





	1. This one I did for our love.

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, this is my first multi chapter fic so bear with me. Hope you like it.
> 
> \- ivy.
> 
> PS: please keep in mind that english it's not my first language, so forgive my typos and weird expressions.

Everybody knew them, everyone cheered for them and all eyes were on them. The most famous couple in K-Pop industry, the couple everybody saw bloom before their eyes: Soojin and Shuhua. After debuting with other four girls as the group knows as (G)I-DLE, the relationship between the two singers caught attention from the fans and the LGBTQIA+ community. See Shuhua declaring her love for the dancer, Soojin taking care of the youngest when she thought nobody was looking, the soft touches, the stares, the words of encouragement, Shuhua’s hand always finding their way to the other’s waist, Soojin’s eyes trained on the youngest to understand what she’s feeling. All those things became normal for the fans.

With time, even without knowing what was really going on behind the cameras, everyone who took a good look at them were convinced that there was something more there. So it didn’t take long until the media started to dig in on their personal lives and the company to make money from the friendship they had.

After a long time of speculations and theories the Dispatch team found proofs that the two singers were dating. The media went wild, everyone wanted to know more about them and the truth behind their relationship, every reporter wanted a headline. Those times were a mess for the girls, not only for the couple but all of the members in the group, they couldn’t go to the grocery shop without cameras been shoved on their faces, they spent a whole year without any interactions with their fans, without working, with fear of a possible disband. That year was the most complicated of their careers but for their personal lives too, with confused feelings and fear always around the corner.

But they made it through, the company decided to give them a comeback and see how the public reacted. It wasn’t easy, sure there were a massive support from all over the world and a part of South Korea, but there were a lot of hate comments and swearing at the girls, a good part of Asian wasn’t ready for a public relationship between two girls, or any gay couple for the matter, but the other idols in the industry were supportive, always saying words of encouragement and educating their fans, really helped with the group’s reputation.

When the couple made a statement confirming their relationship they made a pact to show everyone that they were a couple like any other straight couple. So the South Korea fell in love with the girls seeing their cute picnic dates, the caring touches, the couples clothes they always wore, the love in their eyes when looking at each other, the small declarations of love. No one could resist their love and, just like that, they became Korea’s sweethearts. And that peace went on for long years, but life it’s never easy.

So when the news of a possible cheating scandal appeared the whole world was shocked, they couldn’t believe their favorite couple was involved in something like this. Nobody knew what was really going on behind the spotlight, the singers never let on anything about their fights or arguments. Being a LGBTQIA+ couple was already difficult without the public pressure on you, they didn’t need everyone’s opinion on how to handle their fights or people saying their discussions were happing because a gay couple couldn’t be happy.

Then Dispatch published two articles hinting that their love wasn’t as real as appeared, the world were startled and in denial. Fans made theories about was going on with them, a possible breakup was all the gossip magazines talked about, their friends started blowing up their phones to see how the girls were doing, it was a mess. Their company released a statement asking for respect for their privacy but didn’t do much more to help the girls.

But what the public didn’t know was that Shuhua was staying at Yuqi’s place, that Soojin was feeling lonely in their house without her lover, but there was only so much they could do right now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_It was a new world for Shuhua, moving from Twain and coming to Korea to be a singer, without even knowing how to speak Korean, leaving her parents to pursue her dreams. It was like her world made a 360 turn. But since she was a baby Shuhua knew she was destined to be a singer, always singing when she had the chance, being part of the theatre club, finding ways to put her feelings out in form of music, to reach people’s heart with a beautiful melody and meaningful lyric. She knew she could do this but never had she imagined it would be in another country far away from her parents. So when she was recruited back in Twain the young girl never would think she needed to move to South Korea, but her parents were supportive and never let the girl doubt her talent._

_She took a plane within a month from the recruit day, after a long trip some staff from the company picked her up and they made their way to the company. She spent all the way there worrying about not knowing how to communicate with the staff and other trainees, asking herself if she was enough to debut someday._

_When they got there the staff guided her to the CEO’s office right away. After talking with him about the details of her contract, her accommodations and her schedule, he introduced the manager who was responsible for the group of girls who have a shot to debut in the next girl group the company is putting together. The manager was a young woman, probably in her 30s, very kind and lovely. They went to the practice room where the other girls were waiting for the dance class to start. The manager introduced Shuhua to them (she couldn’t understand a thing that came out of the woman’s mouth besides her name). The Taiwanese bowed to them and said hello with a broken Korean, her voice small from the shyness._

_When the teacher came the manager took Shuhua to the cafeteria so they could eat something before she had to attend her language class. Everything was going fast; the Taiwanese had no time to think before she was being dragged to class after class, trying her best to keep up with what others said to her. She took her dance classes, met the vocal couch and had two classes of language since she needed to learn at least the basics for communication._

_At the end of the day she was exhausted, hungry and homesick. On her way to the dorms where she was staying she took a minute to message her parents and tell them she was fine. When the non-Korean entered the dorms she was met with some of the girls she saw on the dance class, being a shy mess she bowed to them and asked the manager where her room was. The woman took her to one of the bedrooms and informed she was sharing the room with another girl; Shuhua thanked the woman and started unpacking. She was dying for a shower but was too shy to do anything with the other girls walking around the dorm, Shuhua could hear the voices on the living room but couldn’t understand much._

_She was lying on the empty bed when she heard a knock on the door, she got up and bowed to the figure that entered the room._

_“I heard you speak Chinese?” Shuhua was surprised when she heard the girl speak on a language she could understand._

_“Yes, I’m from Taiwan. How can you speak Chinese?”_

_“Oh, I’m from Pequim, my name is Yuqi. I suppose you are the new trainee?” Yuqi asked with a smile on her face._

_“Yes, it is me. It’s good to have someone who speaks the same language as me.” A light shade of red could be seen on the Taiwanese girl._

_“Yeah, I struggled to communicate when I first got here too, but I can help you with Korean if you would like.” The Chinese girl offered._

_“I would like that very much.”_

_“Ok, let me know when you free or need help in your language class. Anyway have you seen the dorm yet? I could show you around and introduce you better to the girls.”_

_“That would be great!” Shuhua answered with a smile._

_Since that day they got closer, with Yuqi helping Shuhua to communicate with the others and her language class. As shy as she was with time passing by the Taiwanese girl felt more comfortable and started to get close with the other girls, Soojin always helped her with the dance class and Shuhua couldn’t help but brush anytime the dancer put her hands on her waist to teach a new movement, Miyeon made sure the younger was eating and drinking water between the practices and to always bicker with her so the girl could somehow still maintem her adolescence, Soyeon helped her writing songs and composing, Minnie made her laugh like no one and just like that the six girls became friends._

_But even surround by people who cared about her Shuhua felt homesick, being away from her parents was hard all the time, but especially in days when the training were extensive and exhausting and the teachers were not the kind to sugarcoat when speaking about the mistakes she made. She was sixteen, away from her parents, in a country she’s never been before, still had troubles speaking Korean, trying to adapt to a whole new culture and traditions, Shuhua was due to break at some point._

_“What do you think you doing, Yeh Shuhua? You think you can debut with these sloppy movements and your lack of coordination?” the teacher spoke like they were reading the list of grocery shop. “If you don’t get better in three weeks you gonna fail your monthly exam.” The woman sighed. “You can go now.”_

_Shuhua was holding her tears as she got out of the practice room, when she couldn’t keep it in anymore she fail apart at the stairs, hiding her face on her hands. All the emotional stress washing over her in the form of tears. The Taiwanese never felt so alone, sure she had the girls but they didn’t talk about those things, they never talked about their feelings, so she bottled everything up afraid that she would scare the girls if she asked for help. The fear of not being enough, not improving in her skills, still not confident enough on her Korean to sing in front of other people. Her body was exhausted with the long hours of practicing, the young girl always staying behind to practice until her body gave up, her mind making her doubt herself every step of the way. Not being able to receive a comfort hug from her mother or hearing her father saying that she was born to be a singer only made things worse. The singer was so far gone in her thoughts that she didn’t notice someone had sat beside her._

_“Hey.” Soojin’s voice was sweet, dripped in concern for the younger. Shuhua couldn’t talk so Soojin put her arm around her shoulders and let the younger cry on her shoulder. “Just let it all out, I’m here for you.”_

_So they spent minutes there, Soojin understood what she was going through, herself had fall apart a couple times, so she sat there drawing random patterns on the Taiwanese’s back, letting her cry._

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

“I can’t believe you were out with her, Soojin. You know she likes you and you still keep giving her hope!” Shuhua was screaming, tears streaming down her face.

“I’m sorry if I like to receive the attention she gives me, attention that I should receive from my girlfriend but you too busy with everything else in your life that you can’t even have dinner with me or get home on a reasonable hour!” The pain was dripping from Soojin’s voice but she refused to cry. “I spent a whole week without talking to you or even seeing you. If it wasn’t for your wet towel or your chloetes in the bathroom I wouldn’t even know if you were coming back home every night.”

“I’m not the villain here! I was working! On my comeback. You know how demanding this is.”

“Oh for God’s sake, Shuhua, don’t play dumb here. When I had a comeback I made sure to at least have dinner with you twice a week, I left messages for you every day. You don’t get to blame your work for this when we both know you could have made some time for us.” Soojin wasn’t having any of it. She was tired of being the one giving but never receiving.

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

_Since that day Soojin held a crying Shuhua in her arms for the first time they were never apart anymore, always holding hands, getting each other food, practicing together, watching dramas to help with Shuhua’s Korean, confiding their fears and helping each other the best way they could. In fact all six girls became even more close to each other after a really tough time when they were all worried about their futures on the company, they became a family of some sorts. When things got too hard they would get together at their living room and talk about what was making then sad or when word wasn’t enough they would dance and sing their hearts out._

_They would cry and laugh together with the others trainees too, but when push come to shove it was always the six of them together at someone’s room listing a sad song playlist._

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

“You were the only one who always knew how to comfort me. You had the right words every time and when that wasn’t enough you would hug me like nothing could hurt me if I was in your arms. But now you hug is so loose, your lips feel strange in mine and I don’t even remember the last time you cuddle me to sleep or put your hands on my waist. And don’t say this is my fault because I’m not home anymore because this has been going for months now, way before I had to work on my comeback.” Shuhua’s voice was calm but the pain was still there. “Why do you think I got so into my music? Because you weren’t there and the only thing I had to fill up the emptiness you left in my heart was my music.”

“Why didn’t you talk to me? Why didn’t you confront me?” Soojin’s eyes were filled with sorrow. “Why you never tell me the things I do that hurt? How do you expect me to me to know something is hurting you when you don’t show it? You can’t keep bottling things up and hope they magically disappear. You need to start talking to me, Shuhua.”

The younger didn’t answered so the two woman stayed silent. Shuhua sat still in their bed with tears stained her face and the sheets, Soojin had her back pressed to the wall in front of her girlfriend, her knees up and her face resting on her hands. There were two hearts on that room and both were breaking.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_Two years after Shuhua’s arrival, a lot of struggles, endless all nighters, lot of tears and sweat the CEO decided the final debut group. They name was decided, (G)I-DLE, they were training like crazy to do an excellent job, staying up late to craft the choreography, having extra classes with their vocal coach. Their debut song was produced by Soyeon and that only made them more excited to do a good job._

_The debut was a success, they were doing good in the charts, their performances were mesmerizing and the girls always came up with something new to do on stage, some idols were singing their song on vlive, they got their first win in a music show just 20 days after the release. The company saw they were getting attention and decided to record everything they did in the backstage of their schedule be it for a music show, the filming of music videos, the photoshot for the jacket album, pretty much everything they did outside the dorms was recorded._

_So soon enough the public noticed the interactions between Shuhua and Soojin, how the younger was always confessing her love for the singer and calling her ‘honey’, how Soojin pretended to not like the attention in front of camera but were often caught taking care of the Taiwanese when she thought no one was watching, the soft touches were there every once in a while, Shuhua’s jealousy when Miyeon get too close to Soojin never failed in making people laugh. The fans were quick to come up with a name for the ‘ship’: SooShu._

_They got popular pretty quick so the company took the chance and were giving them comeback after comeback, they even competed on a survival show called ‘The Queendom’, unfortunally the girls didn’t win but they delivered amazing performances and made good friends like the singer Park Bom and the girl group Mamamoo. Even with little time for rest and a packed schedule their friendship only grow stronger, the six were always there for each other if anyone needed them so they made trough the hard times._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Why did you distance yourself from me, Soojin? What did I do?” Her voice was a broken whisper.

“I don’t know, Shuhua. One minute you there and the other you were getting out every night, drinking until late with your new friends, forgetting our dates. For the first time in my life I recorded a music video without you showing up to see how it was going but these are things I can get used to.” Soojin was staring the floor that seemed very interesting at the moment. “What I can’t get used to is not having you in my arms when I wake up, have to spend a whole week without hearing one word from you, not felling your hands on my waist. I can’t get used to not seeing your smile everyday or the cute pout on your lips when you’re frusted about something. I can’t get used to not having you by my side, but it’s been a long, very long, time since you were actually by my side.”

The silence took over the room again. The air was filled with spoken words, regrets and pain. So much pain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_It had been a while since they last performed LATATA, but they were attending a year end award and Soyeon suggested they made a medley of their title tracks and digital singles to celebrate the two years of the group and the members loved the idea. The group spent days and nights practicing the routines and crafting their vocals. It was a Friday night and all the girls were already at the dorms but Shuhua decided to stay behind and practice a bit more._

_When the Taiwanese debuted a lot of people praised her vocal and performance but the negative comments were there too and Shuhua was the kind of person that focus more on the wrongs then the rights and she was still so young to be in the public eye, only twenty years old and she was already exposed to people who didn’t care about someone else’s feelings._

_The singer stuglered a lot with her confidence and started to doubt even more every single thing she did, the members made sure to praise her and tell her she did a good job, but there was only so much they could do and so much Shuhua let on about the struggle she was going through. Soojin worried a lot about their youngest, herself going trough troubles with her self steam, the dancer made sure to make time to help Shuhua with anything she could._

_So when Soojin appeared in the practice room with food Shuhua wasn’t surprised. They ate between giggles and bad jokes and went back to practicing, the Taiwanese was grateful for the elder’s help and patience. The two girls were the fairy ends for LATATA and Shuhua tough it was a good idea to kiss Soojin on the cheek at the end so when the Korean told it was getting dark and they had to go home soon the singer asked them to go over the choreo one last time, wanting to surprise the dancer._

_As they approached the end Shuhua went for the kiss having no idea the other was going to do the same thing so when both girls went for the kiss instead of lips finding skin they found each other’s lips. It didn’t last a second but none knew what to do, they couldn’t figure out what was that stranger buzzing felling on their lips or why their hearts skipped a beat, a few seconds of awkwardness passed by before they both busted in laughter._

_“Come on, it’s late in the night already let’s go home.” Soojin said still with a small smile on her face. They picked up their things and made their way to the dorms._

_The two young girls never spoke about what happened in the practice room but the kiss lingered in their minds._

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

Shuhua got up from bed, grabbed a backpack and started putting some clothes and personal accessories there.

“What are you doing?” Soojin asked a little confused.

“I can’t stay here tonight. I will sleep at Yuqi’s.”

“Are you breaking up with me?” Desesperation could be heard on the elder’s voice.

“I don’t know I just can’t stay here tonight.” Shuhua said as she left the room.

Soojin stayed on the room’s floor; tears stained her face once again when she heard the front door being closed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_It was a few weeks after the practice incident and Shuhua couldn’t get the memories of that night out of her head. So when she found herself alone with Miyeon on the dorms she decide to ask for some advice._

_“I need help but you can’t tell anyone about this, unnie.” The Taiwanese said in a small voice, shyness and fear of judgment clear on her voice._

_“Ok, whatever it is stays between us.” Miyeon put a hand on the younger’s knee trying to calm her a little._

_After a few moments trying to gather courage Shuhua spoke._

_“Soojin and I accidently kissed, on the lips.” The non-Korean prepared herself for the judgmental look on the elder face but it never came so she continued. “We laughed it off but the memories keep surfacing in my head and my heart gets all warm. I don’t know what it is and I’m scared, Miyeon-unnie.”_

_“I see. Have you two talked about it?” Miyeon’s voice was nothing but calm and understanding at that moment._

_“No, I don’t wanna bring it up and make things awkward between us or risk losing her friendship. Soojin-unnie it’s very important to me.” Her hands were sweating with nervousness._

_“Shuhua, have you considered that you may like Soojin more than in a friendly way? You may like her the way you were taught to like boys?”_

_Shuhua didn’t want to admit but the thought had crossed her mind multiple times. She knew she admired girls way too much, but she thought it was normal never had she questioned this could be something more._

_“I don’t know unnie. I’m scared.” Some tears made their way on her face and Miyeon was quick to wrap her in a tight hug, knowing they had a long journey ahead._

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

They futures were full with uncertainness and doubts and neither could imagine a life without the other in it. Their love was something beautiful that brought them calm winds and warm nights, cozy afternoons in bed and lazy weekends. The couple had grow together, becoming women beside each other and everyone had silently agreed they would spent the rest of their lives loving each other easily, but now this possibility seen almost impossible.


	2. Dinning table

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I'm back with another chapter. Sorry for the waiting,my house is being reforming (?) renovated (?) idk what's the right word to use here. Besides that I was having the final days of college and it's really stressful.   
> Anyway, hope you like it.
> 
> @DrunnkIvy
> 
> (Ps: please, keep in mind english it's not my first language.)

Before the day.

Soojin was confused. The accident that happened in the practice room was always at the back of her head, whenever she had free time the kiss would surface in her mind along with a warm feeling in her heart that she didn’t know what it was. Shuhua seemed unfazed with what happened, she even joked about it in one of their I-TALK, the behind stage footage of their performances. The dancer was now more aware of her proximity with the taiwanese and she was going crazy with how much she was over thinking her feelings for the younger.

She tried her best to not let whatever she was feeling interfere with their friendship but she couldn’t help wondering if what she had with Shuhua was somehow different to what she had with other members. The social media didn’t help at all, fans were making compilations of their interactions and how she was more kind and caring and gentle towards Shuhua, some of them even thought the two girls were in love. The love declarations the younger was often saying made it even harder for her to pretend everything was normal.

Soojin was confused because she thought that the shivers down her spine when they touched was normal, that the happiness that embraced her when she made Shuhua smile was normal, she thought the smile she couldn’t help whenever she saw the singer was normal, that the warm felling in her heart whenever Shuhua said she loved her was normal. But now everyone who knew they public figure were telling that all those things she felt with Shuhua she was supposed to feel with a boy and all this was messing with her head. Sure, she had had a girl crush but that was all that it was: a crush.

Soojin was confused but she had no one to talk to. Well, she had the girls but she is afraid that whatever this is would scare them away. So she bottled everything up and told herself she was being paranoid and an over thinker.

And things go well until she is alone with Shuhua in the practice room again. It’s almost nine-o’clock and they decided to stay behind again to practice some more. Shuhua is actually doing pretty great with the new choreography but the self doubt that she has gets the best of her often and Soojin knows better than trying to dissuade the younger to go home earlier, so she stays behind to help her.

“Ok, we gonna research one more time the whole choreo then we gonna eat and go home, ok?” Soojin says while starting the song one more time.

“Ok, unnie.” Shuhua was starting to feel tired after practicing the choreography for the past two hours, so she didn’t argue.

They take their positions and as soon as the music fills the room their bodies starts to move around the room in perfect synchrony. Soojin lets the melody flow through her body and fill all her senses, Shuhua’s eyes linger in her reflection in the mirror but she’s too focused to notice it. They go through the routine without talking, focusing only on the song’s tempo and expressing the lyrics with their bodies. When the music ends both girls are breathing heavily.

“Here, let me show you how you can improve that hip movement in the bridge.” Soojin calls her. When the taiwanese is close enough she put her hands on her hips and starts humming the rhythm of the song while their bodies starts to move like one.

Then Shuhua’s smell is filling her lungs, the feeling of her skin in her hands is overwhelming, the way their bodies are so close to each other makes her heart race, then Shuhua starts to humming along with her and the slow rhythm of the song coming trough her voice is making her go crazy, all those things leaves Soojin intoxicated. She turns Shuhua to face her and stops their movements letting the younger get closer and closer, her hands firm on her waist like she was holding her world right there. Until there’s no space between them, her heart races and her breath is uneven, Shuhua licks her lower lip while her eyes are focused on the older’s mouth. It’s when their lips are almost touching that they hear someone passing by the door and the moment is broken.

Soojin clears her throat and put some space between them. “We should get going.”

Shuhua whispers a confirmation with a raspy tone and they gather their things. That night both girls leave the practicing room with red cheeks and uneven breaths, their minds full with questions, possibilities and fears. The ride back to the dorms is filled with a heavy silence, both forgetting that they were supposed to grab something to eat on their way.

~~~~~~~~~~~

When they got to the dorms they went separate ways, Soojin making a beeline to her bedroom. She enters the room and fell head first on the mattress, replaying the moment with the younger over and over in her mind. _What was I thinking_ , Soojin asks herself, _was I really about to kiss Shuhua?_

Suddenly the doors open and a sleepy Minnie walks in. “Oh hi! I thought you were at the company with Shuhua.” She spoke; usually they wouldn’t be back until ten o’clock.

“I was but we decided to head back early this time.” Soojin answers still with her face on the mattress.

“I see, well I just came to get my earphones that I forget here the other night.” The thai girl said while her eyes scanned the room.

“It’s on my drawer.” The dancer turns on her back and stares at the ceiling.

“Are you ok, Soojinnie?” Minnie’s voice had a hint of worry. Soojin weren’t one to talk much but tonight the girl had a thoughtful look in her eyes.

“Yeah, I’m fine just thinking about some things.”

“Well, I’m here if you need someone to talk to.” Minnie ruffled the Korean girl’s hair and left the room.

Soojin could really use someone to talk to but she knew the moment her thoughts left her mouth everything would become somewhat more real and she wasn’t prepared for that yet. So she kept quiet in her bed letting her mind wander around.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just like the first time what happened in the practice room didn’t interfered with their friendship and both girls never talked about it. But the tension was getting stronger with each passing day and Soojin had no idea how to deal with it. It was like something switched in her mind and all she could think was how soft Shuhua’s lips most feel, how their hands fit perfectly together and how the younger’s perfume it’s heavenly good.

Besides that there was this feeling keeping her up at night, like something was going to happen, but she couldn’t place a finger on what it was. Soojin just felt it there, like electricity running through her veins, like the universe was warning her. It never went away; sometimes it faded a little like when she was focusing on practicing the new choreography for their new song or when she spent the afternoon talking about everything and anything with the girls. She just felt that something was going to happen, she just didn’t know what.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The answer came several weeks later, when Soojin and Shuhua were tangled in her bed watching some silly drama like old times. It was the taiwanese’s idea telling the dancer she missed spending time with her. The dancer felt nervous about being alone with the girl again but she missed her too. So she settled in spending the evening with Shuhua in her arms and complaining about the slow plot of the drama.

The electricity was there with every move the younger made and every time her senses were filled with the singer’s smell and every time her heart would skip a beat when she heard that laugh she came to love so much. At some point they forgot about the drama playing and started talking about the old days.

“Do you remember when you first came to the company?” Soojin asked, a smile playing in her lips.

“God, I was so shy at that time. I didn’t know a word in Korean.” Shuhua answered hiding her face in the crock of the older’s neck.

“You were red like a tomato when Yuqi dragged you out of your room to talk with us. I tough you were so cute back then.” The korean’s arms hold the younger closer like it was second nature.

“You don’t think I’m cute anymore?” The singer said with a pout on her lips.

“Of course I still think you’re cute but now I see you’re so much more than that. You grew up so much since that day. Now you can speak what’s on your mind without fearing anyone will make fun of you, you are beautiful women now with a strong mind and a big heart that wants to make everyone happy. Also when you’re in stage your exhale confidence and know how to keep everyone’s eyes on you.” Soojin rambled on.

“Unnie, you’re making me blush.” Shuhua said as she hides her face on the pillow after, a moment of silence she spoke again. “I remember clearly the day I was crying at the stairs after our teacher said I wasn’t going to pass the monthly exam, I was so upset back then. She knew I was giving my all in practice and even back then I used to stay behind to practice my vocals and dance and even more my Korean.”

“We all know you always gave your all, Shu. I was worried about you since the beginning if I’m being honest. You see, besides you Yuqi and Minnie are foreign too and they used to talk about how much they missed their families and their country but you never said anything. I knew it would come a moment when you would break. I wish I had been there for you earlier but I didn’t know how to approach you, I’m sorry.” Soojin spoke with a low voice, afraid that if she spoke too loud the moment would break. The younger laid facing the dancer and allowed her hands to trace each trace of the Korean’s face as she spoke.

“You don’t need to apologize, JinJin. I know you did your best and I was too scared to sound like I didn’t appreciate being here and having a chance at debuting. The moment you sat beside me and let me cry on your shoulder without speaking one word was the moment I knew I could count on you for anything the same way you can count on me.”

The dancer was smiling at the younger, a warm emotion filling her heart. The Taiwanese connected their foreheads and let her fingers run through the dancer’s hair. Soojin’s hands found its place on her waist and just like that the tension was back, their breaths getting caught on their throats, Soojin’s eyes didn’t leave the younger’s lips and all she could think was how soft Shuhua’s lips must feel. This time there was nothing holding them back, no one could walk in on them since they were alone at the dorms. The tension was so high that none of the girls could think straight when their lips touched. Soojin couldn’t tell who leaned in first, all she could think was how Shuhua’s lips were soft and warm and how she could spend the rest of her life kissing the singer.

Shuhua’s hand ran free on her hair, neck and face wanting to feel every inch she could from her but the touches remained soft, she just needed to feel Soojin. The elder Soojin had half of her body pressed to the younger letting herself bask in the felling of the singer’s lips on hers. The kiss wasn’t rushed or deep, it was just their lips moving against each other and Soojin could feel the cherry taste on the girl’s lips. They stayed like that until their lungs begged for air so they let go of each other, their foreheads touching and breath heavy.

“I was gonna say I’m sorry, but I’m not.” Soojin was the first to speak. The feeling was amazing but something in the back of her mind kept telling her that it wasn’t normal, that she should feel ashamed of what she had done and all the things she felt when she was around the younger girl, but she decided to let go of theses thoughts and enjoy the moment.

“I would get really mad if you did.” Shuhua had a smile on her face.

Soojin couldn’t resist the feeling in her heart so she stole another kiss from her. “I think we need to talk, Shuhua.”

“We do but it can wait a few minutes.” The dancer agreed and their lips met again and again and again. Neither girl wanted to let go, they waited two years for this moment so whatever it was they needed to talk about it could wait.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They had stopped kissing for some time and now Soojin had Shuhua’s head on her chest while her hands draw random patterns on her back. Just listing to her easy breath was calming for the elder, her heart never felt more content. The taiwanese never felt more at home since she came to South Korea.

“I thought you were going to kiss me that day in the practice room.” Shuhua’s voice was low and calm, a contrast to her usual self.

“I tough so too, but them someone had to break the moment.” Both girls had a small grin on their faces.

“I was afraid you were gonna distance yourself after that day but then you acted like nothing happened so I never talked to you about it.” Shuhua’s cheeks had now a hint of red.

“Really? In my head you never spoke about it because you tough it was nothing.” Upon hearing what the older girl said Shuhua raised her head to look at her face.

“Every second I spend by your side means something to me, Soojin-unnie. I had this feeling that you were gonna be someone important in my life and I still do ‘til this day.” The taiwanese’s eyes didn’t left Soojin’s for one second while she spoke, trying to convey her feelings on her voice.

“You know, I still feel all warm inside when you call me ‘baby’ or say that you love me in front of everyone.” The dancer had a blush on her cheeks that didn’t seamed to go anywhere soon, not when Shuhua was looking at her like she was the younger’s whole world. “At first I tried to convince myself that these feelings that I have for you were just me trying to care of you, because you’re the youngest of the group, but then the accident in the practice room happened and I couldn’t fool myself anymore.”

“So you have feelings for me?” The silly smile was evident on Shuhua’s face.

“Yes, I do have feelings for you. I really like you, Shuhua.” The shine in the elder’s eyes were proof enough that she was being honest with the taiwanese.

“Good, because I really like you too.” The singer placed a sweet kiss on the dancer’s lips. “So, we confessed to each other, we also kissed like a thousand times, right?” She waited for Soojin to confirm so she could continue. “I was wondering, does that means we’re dating?”

“It means we have feelings for each other and like to kiss each other.” Shuhua’s face fell for a moment. “Look, Shu, I really like you and I think I can even love you someday but I don’t want us to go too fast. If we rush with this and things ended up not working it’s not just us who will be affected, it’s the whole group. Do you understand?” There was a part of her still saying what she was doing was wrong but she could deal with it without worrying the younger.

“I understand, unnie. You’re right it’s better we take things slow.”

“Good, now let’s get back to watching that silly drama you love.” Soojin rolled her eyes in a playful way.

Shuhua rested her head on her lover’s chest one more time and Soojin couldn’t be happier with how the evening turned out. The electricity was now gone and all she could feel was a warm feeling embracing her and a happiness she hadn’t felt in a while. They spent the rest of the evening between cuddles, kisses and silly dramas the smile never leaving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Since that day the two girls were closer than never, the members didn’t thought too much about it after all it was promotion time and Shuhua gets clingier when she’s not home with her dogs. Soojin almost never left the taiwanese’s side, always sitting by her side in interviews and lives, talking about her when she was doing some schedule alone, taking pictures of her when she was eating or playing games, Shuhua whined about it but everyone knew she loved the attention from the dancer.

The group was getting more and more attention from the general public around the world. Their fans continued creating content about the two girls and their relationship, sometimes it bothered Soojin to the point she would intentionally distance herself from the younger whenever it had cameras, but she couldn’t refuse her when she would ask to spent the night cuddling with her. The negative thoughts never truly faded away, but the dancer was doing well in ignoring them so far.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the day.

Soojin was getting ready for an interview about her new single; a song about how one is afraid of losing the person they know is their soul mate. The now soloist remembers when she wrote the song, her and Shuhua had their first real fight and she thought she had lost the younger for good, an awful feeling of emptiness in her heart that she though nothing could be worse than that, but the universe loves to prove her wrong. So here she was a couple weeks after the Taiwanese left their home and stopped talking to her, releasing a song she wrote about losing her soulmate, how ironic it could be.

As the dancer was getting the final touches in her makeup someone entered her waiting room. The ash grey short hair was enough for her to know who it was.

“Soojin-ah! It’s been centuries since we last saw each other.” Moonbyul, former member of Mamamoo and a good friend of Soojin’s, said as soon as she saw the younger. They met at the TV show called Queendom and since then the older woman has been a constant in her life. Soojin had a lot to thankful to Moonbyul, she was the first person outside her group to tell the dancer that it was ok to love another girl, that she didn’t had to worry about others would think about it because it was Soojin’s life and only her could know what was wrong and right in her own life. When they first met the dancer couldn’t have imagined that she would spent hours talking to her about her worries, listening to the older’s complaining about her now wife and drinking ice Americano at random cafés around Seoul.

“Unnie! You’re right, but I’m so busy with practices and filming for the comeback that I barely have time to eat.” The singer hugged the elder after her makeup was done.

“Comeback time it’s tough, I know. But you gotta take care, little one.”

“Stop calling me that, Byul-unnie, I’m not a kid anymore.”

“You’ll always be my kid, Soojinie.” The smile never left Byulyi’s face.

“How’s your company? I heard you debuting a girl group soon.” The dancer gestured for them to take a sit. She still had some minutes before having to go on stage.

“Yeah, they debuting late this year. They are seven amazing talented girls; I think you’ll like them.” Moonbyul answered but didn’t gave time for the younger to answer, knowing too well that she was trying to avoid a certain topic. “How are you? And don’t lie to me, I know you well enough to know when you’re laying”

“I’m tired. Things are chaotic but I’m getting by.” The singer spoke letting a sigh escape her lips.

“How are things with Shuhua?” Just the look on the younger’s face was enough to know that things were not fine.

“Honestly, I don’t know where we stand right now. She’s not sleeping at our house, in fact, it’s been a few weeks since we last saw or talked to each other, and I don’t know what to do.” Soojin couldn’t be more honest, the fight they had was always in the back of her head, clouding her thoughts and actions. She just wanted the younger back at home so they could talk things out, but that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.

“So it was that bad, hm? But be patient and things will work themselves out. Have you tried talk to her?”

“Not yet, I was trying giving ourselves space to clear our minds but now I just don’t know how to even start talking to her. The media are like vultures looking for the tiniest detail to make a headline putting us down even more I don’t know how I can take it anymore.” Soojin tried not to look at what people were talking about them but that was an old habit that she never fully let go of. “I talk with Yuqi on a daily basis so I know that she at least is eating all her meals and getting the right amount of sleep. She’ll have a comeback soon too so I worry that she won’t take care of her health. I’m mad at her for the things she said and did, but at the same I just want us to go back to what we were.”

Byulyi saw the younger was holding her tears. The situation itself wasn’t good but have the media’s eyes on you 24/7 didn’t help, the rapper herself being in the industry long enough to know that. “Stay away from social media and take some time to yourself; you have enough on your mind right now. I’m sure Yuqi is taking care of her, but you have to do the same for yourself too. You know we say things we don’t mean at the heat of the moment, surely you said things that have hurt her too, but you’ll get past this just give it time and when you both ready you can talk about everything with a clear vision. Just remember that I’m only a call or text away if you need me.”

“I know and I’m grateful for that, Unnie.” Byulyi wrapped her arms around Soojin and held her tight. “I really need to get some things out of my chest so I’ll call later, ok?”

“Ok, I’ll be waiting for it. Now go on that stage and let your mind and heart focus on what you love to do.”

“Ok, thanks for passing by, unnie; it really means a lot to me.” Soojin watched as the woman left her waiting room. Her mind was a chaos but Byulyi was right, all she need right was to have some fun with her fans.

And that was what she did, the moment she was up stage all her worries left her mind and all she could feel was the rhythm of the song, her feet moving like the routine was second nature to it, her voice letting all her pain out. For four minutes it was like nothing existed besides her and the music, it was the first time after the fight that she felt in peace.

After she went back to the dressing room and changed to more comfortable cloths she picked her phone to see what time it was but one message from a certain someone caught her attention.

**_From: Shuhua_ **

_I remember today is your comeback stage_

_Good luck._

And maybe, just maybe, everything was going to be good again at some point.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was really struck at this chapter and how t develop their relationship but i guess it will be easier to write from now on. Please, tell me what you think about the story so far :)


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